Silence is a Bliss.

I guess the old saying is that silence is golden. I don't know about that, golden suggest that the value of silence is based on exchange. Silence would have to then come at some kind of expense. Its never quiet in our house, last summer was the closest its ever come to being peaceful. When the street out front was shut down for construction. The construction noise actually came as a relief. At least it was over by six o'clock every night. The traffic might stop for an hour or two around four am.

The constant background noise of the traffic has been supplemented in recent days by my new downstairs neighbour who cannot play guitar. I believe strongly that his condition is terminal. He will never be a guitar player in a band, although that appears to be his dearest wish. He also believes in the adage "Practice makes perfect."

That there is no sound barrier or insulation of any kind between our apartments is merely the icing on the cake.

I never thought that I would fantasize about Lion's Head. My entire childhood was spent dreaming of ways to escape from that hamlet. Now I imagine what it would be like to bring Chloe there, to put her to bed in a room not lit by the street light outside. To have her wake in the morning to the sound of that incredibly annoying seagull that used to scream on our roof instead of a rooster. And then I think about how much snow they got this winter, how insanely cold it was. Not having power for days. Usually though the memories of the cold are balanced by the memory of how warm the house is. At least in Ontario they build houses with insulation.

And then I think about the fact that there would be no job for me there, not to mention Mister. I'm pretty sure we wouldn't have to pay rent, but how would we put food on the table? I can't see a niche for me in Lion's Head. I tried to burn that bridge when I left for university. I might have succeeded too well. I can't see my new family being comfortable anywhere on the Peninsula. Not for any length of time anyway. Maybe in one of the bigger small cities Kitchner with Toad or maybe London. It all seems like a pipe dream though. We have almost no savings, how would we ever manage to get together enough money to move back east, pay first and last on an apartment or better yet a house and find decent jobs? I'm not going to win the lottery because I don't play. I guess I have to keep my fingers crossed that Dad might eventually win and feel generous!

The house is as quiet as its going to get so I guess I ought to try and get some sleep.